29.

Yesterday was my 29th birthday.

I have done a lot of growing, learning, hurting, and healing during this year and for this reason, I have a feeling that 29 will be a good year in the life of Meghan.

At 29, I am honest with myself.  I journal honestly, not writing what I want to believe is true, but writing what is the truth.  I write what is on my heart and in my thoughts and sometimes I’m ashamed of what I write, but I write it anyway.  Sometimes I sit in awe of the growth I can see through the pages and sometimes I just write to release. 

At 29, I understand the value of friendship.  During the past year, I have been so blessed with new developing friendships and rekindling old ones.   I am learning the importance of making my own friends, surrounding myself with people who inspire me, support me, excite me, encourage me, and love me.

At 29, I let others in. I tell my story. I share the excitements and joys of day-to-day life. I talk about the hard things, let myself cry and let others see it. I openly talk about parts of my life that I was once afraid to discuss, and show others and myself just how far I’ve come and how God has carried me through it all.  These conversations have led to long prayers, long talks, and deeply rooted trusting friendships.

At 29, I push myself forward.  I look forward. Move ahead. Walk through the doors that have been opened to me and take those opportunities for all they’re worth.

At 29, I say “yes.”  Yes, to going out for dinner after a long day at work so I can catch up with a friend. Yes, to staying up late on a work night so I can karaoke with the girls. Yes, to vacations and weekend trips even if I have to watch my budget before and after to make it happen. Yes, to “can I have your number?” and “can I see you again?” Yes, to new chances, new opportunities, new friends, and if it happens… new love.

At 29, I embrace my age.  My “twenties” are nearly over. One would think that the days of Girls Nights and sleepovers are gone.  My plans for 29 included husband and home, babies and bottles. But the reality of 29 is that I finally found my inner circle, finally found my voice, my strenghth, finally found happiness without the things I thought I needed.

At 29, I accept my quirks. I wear knee-high socks all winter long. I make up lyrics to songs when I don’t know the right ones.  I eat candy canes all year long. I am a musical theater fanatic and I’m not afraind to claim my theater, chorus, marching band history. I still cry when I watch The Notebook, every time. I also cry almost every time I watch my little brother Cameron lead worship. Maybe I should just cut to the chase and say that I’m a crier.  I like cold pizza for breakfast and breakfast for dinner.  I’ll go above and beyond to plan a party but take a week to clean it all up afterward.  I am forgetful and it it’s not written down it doesn’t exist.  I know these things about myself and I’m ok with it. That’s just me.

At 29, I have no regrets.  I choose to live in the present, not regretting mistakes of my past but instead thanking God that I had those opportunities to grow and become the woman I am today.  Without those experiences I would not be so strong.

At 29, I am happy. Joyful. Free.

Excited to see what my 29th year brings.