This is a long blog, which I apologize for, but I hope it’s worth it.

Somewhat recently, I endured a difficult break up with a boyfriend I had dated for a year and a half. The break up wasn’t hard because I wanted us to get back together; in fact, we both knew we weren’t exactly the most compatable couple. This break up was difficult because I realized that without that male companion in my life, I felt so alone. I have plenty of people around me who love me dearly, but I still felt alone. Loneliness is perhaps the worst emotion one can feel, and I felt it deeply.

One night, when I realized even our friendship couldn’t survive the realm of emotions we shared, I went home and cried for what seemed like hours. I mourned the death of our relationship and our friendship. But then I began to pray, and as much as I cried, I prayed even more. I didn’t really know what to pray for or what I needed from God at that time, but He knew what I needed even when I didn’t. Eventually, I fell asleep with a pile of tissues on the floor by my bed and a few simple thoughts written in my journal.

And now, if you ask me how I’m doing, I’ll most likely say “God is good!” like a true Southern Baptist, because the very next morning, I woke up A NEW CREATION!!!!! God renewed me in HIS strength, and revived my spirit like no single person on this Earth can EVER do. He took my broken spirit when I felt so unloved and so weak in my loneliness, and He filled me with HIS love and HIS strength!!!!!

God has taught me that people will always disappoint me; we’re humans, and sinners, but HE is the solid rock that will ALWAYS be there for me to stand on, He will ALWAYS be strong, He will pick us up when we’ve fallen and renew our strength when we cannot find our own. He will NEVER disappoint us. He will NEVER let us down.

As I write this, I must share with you one every special part of the story. The song that brought me to tears the day I awoke with such a renewed spirit was my own brother’s song “You Are.” I’ve listened to the song for years and it has never impacted me the way it did this day. It’s such a simple song, but the lyrics say everything I was feeling, and I listened to it all day. (Cam, your simple song is PERFECT!) Here are some sections of the lyrics that God used that day to really speak to my heart.

Beautiful Savior
Majestic and ready for my fall
Forgiving and perfect

When I came to You
My old lost life was through
You cleansed me and washed me
You never forgot me
I love you

When times get hard
And I’m on my face on the ground
I’ll turn over quickly
My eyes are amazed
As the sky opens up

You are glory
You are power

I planned to write this blog weeks ago but never felt the inspiration to write (you fellow writers will understand). But today I turned my iPod on to a song Cameron learned for his mission trip to Mississippi. The song is In Christ Alone, and I’ve been listening to it on repeat for over an hour now. The words come to me so fast it seems like my fingers can’t type fast enough! I’ll leave you with these lyrics, which drive me to sing as loud as I can, and bring me to tears all at the same time.

In Christ alone, my hope is found
He is my light, my strength, my song

This cornerstone, a solid ground
Firm through the fiercest draught and storm

What heights above
What depths of peace
When fears are stilled
When strivings cease

My Comforter
My All in All



  1. […] break up because of the relationship itself, but because I was coming to terms with loneliness. On May 17, 2007  I wrote: “I have plenty of people around me who love me dearly, but I still felt alone. […]

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